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  • Word Medicine

    Are you sure you are in the right business?

    Are you sure you are in the right business?

    Do you ever question whether or not you are on the right path with your business?

    Too often women entrepreneurs who would otherwise say YES! I know I am in the right business, can fall prey to doubt and confusion that clouds their vision and their truth.

    Here are some of the ways you can be sure..

    • You love the work
    • You have a passion for it
    • You feel fulfilled and satisfied by how your work is helping others
    • You get to use your God-given skills, gifts and talents on a daily basis
    • You have the creative freedom to continually up level what you do
    • You continue to learn, grow and challenge yourself inside of the work
    • You make a good living doing it

    So, are you in the right business?

    If you said YES!, congrats for having followed your heart and for doing the work your soul has called you to do.

    It isn’t easy to do that in a world that tells you, that the only way to be successful is to go to school, get a job, work for ‘the man’ and then consume, consume, consume until you die (to fill the void of having ignored the desires of your heart!).

    Sometimes though, do you still feel unsatisfied and like ‘something’ is missing? You are not alone.

    There are 3 reasons why this can be so..

    1) Mindset

    • Not understanding how we create and feeling like a victim of circumstance
    • Having a competitive instead of cooperative mindset
    • Lacking clarity (vision)
    • Lack of focus
    • Lacking depth of gratitude
    • Lacking steadiness of faith
    • Not actively preparing for the good to come

    Without the right mindset, we create experiences we don’t want, no matter where we are or how much we have already accomplished. For that reason, we have a big focus around here that includes doing mindset and emotional work.

    Truly there is really nothing else in your way of you having what you want.

    2) Resistance

    • Resistance to doing the less fun stuff
    • Resistance to sales
    • Resistance to marketing
    • Resistance to being visible
    • Resistance to keeping a consistent work schedule
    • Resistance to experiencing failure

    When resistance is in the way (even when we have what we want and all the resources we need at our finger tips), we consistenly fail to act in the way that is necessary to cause increase in our life – to a standard that reflects our values.

    Our true values are reflected in how we spend our time and our money.

    3) Still inside the box

    • Worried about what other people think
    • Being a people pleaser
    • Saying yes to everything
    • Letting ‘shoulds’ dictate your schedule
    • Being afraid to charge what your service is worth
    • Working 9-5, mon-frid
    • Not taking time off
    • Charging by the hour for your services
    • Doing 1 off sessions and having a hard time getting people to commit to the work

    I am adamant that coaching, teaching and healing businesses cannot be sustainable in the ‘business as usual’ model because it eventually leads to burn out.

    As you can see, even with being in the right business, there can be obstacles in the way that can make you doubt if you are on the right path.

    It is all because of mindset patterns, emotional resistance and finally, trying to make your self fit into the box – instead of making your business a perfect fit for who you are.

    That is why the Femme-Preneur business model makeover program includes a mindset makeover, as much as it includes the remodelling of your business.

    In fact, I consider your feelings the fuel that runs your business, and your mindset the steering wheel.photo

    We have a vehicle to give you – a business model that will fit your feminine heart like a glove!

    But at the end of the day, that vehicle will only get you where you want to go, if you put the fuel in and steer it in the direction of your dreams.

    While we can’t do the driving for you, what we can do is give you a vehicle, help you refuel your tank, see truthfully where you are at and give you the map to get you where you want to go!!

    Want to be guided on this road trip?

    We’d love to take you with us!

    Click here to learn more about how we can help you makeover your business!

    Is your business competitive or creative?

    Is your business competitive or creative?

    full moon ladyIs your business competitive or creative?

    There is a creative way of doing business and a competitive one.

    How do you know you’ve created your business on a competitive foundation?

    Here is how….

    1) You started your business from the thought that you are going to do something that is already proven to be a successful business, but you’ll do it better than it has been done.
    2) You are always thinking about people who are more known than you are in your industry – you are critical of them and at the same time worry about what they think of you.
    3) When you see people who work in the same profession or niche as you and you perceive them to be more successful than you are, you feel jealous.
    4) You swing back and forth from feelings of grandiosity and back downward to deep immobilizing insecurity and self loathing.
    5) You are spend more time contemplating your brand, web appearance and presence, than you focus on the continuing development of your product or service.
    6)You spend more energy looking for approval/fame through social media, than you do on creating an amazing experience for your clients.

    At the end of the day, you feel like you are trying hard, but nothing is working to get you the approval and success that you crave.

    The sad reality is that all of the above is super unattractive and it ensures that people will be repelled rather than attracted to working with you.

    What you have to understand is that we communicate WAY more without words.

    Your people can ‘feel’ you.

    When you come from a competitive place, people are turned off. It doesn’t matter if you are smiling and being nice and ‘all that jazz’.

    Your ‘energy’ is communicating selfish, desperate and a needy kind of energy, that literally repels people.

    If you see yourself in some or all of the above, it can bring up shame… but don’t worry that is because it is coming up to be released.

    We know that those qualities are not really who you are inside, so instead of suppressing, rejecting, scoffing at and denying the feelings that come up about this, can you just pause, acknowledge where you see them, feel them fully and let them go?

    Every person reading this along with you, can relate to all or some of the above mentioned things, because we are all humans who have been raised in a world that values competition.

    In fact, business and competition are often seen as synonymous.

    And it is true that people definitely have competed their way to the top of their field by pushing people out of the way, tripping others, stealing, lying and cheating. But there is no reward there. Those are the unhappy rich we use as excuses to justify for ourselves why becoming wealthy is not a worthy goal (but that is a topic for another conversation)!

    The problem for people like us, is that we’ve been programmed with unconscious competitive impulses that propel us away from our goals.

    That is because competition is in direct opposition to what your heart was seeking when you first started your business.

    You were thinking about how you could help, make a difference and make the world a more beautiful place.

    The problem started when you told yourself ‘I’ve got to figure out how to turn this thing into a profitable business”.

    For most people, learning to start a business distracts us from what inspired us to serve in the first place.

    We become so focused on the ‘how’ of it all, to the point that our focus becomes self centred and we project outwardly from a place of lack, as we try to get our basic financial needs met.

    But you can’t get your business off the ground, if you are mired down in that kind of overwhelm (figuring it out) or when you are projecting desperation, fear and lack.

    You need to start thinking and acting in a different way that has nothing to do with figuring things out.

    To help you do that, we’ve created the Business Model Makeover program.

    It will help you rebuild the foundation of your business on a creative and cooperative foundation – one that builds your confidence, self esteem and the value of what you offer in the process.

    To make sure that NOTHING will stand in the way of you getting the support you need, we’ve put together a pre launch flash sale to make sure that there is no obstacle to you getting back on the path to building your biz from the heart.

    We live for this work and we want to make sure that no one in our community gets left behind and that is why we have chosen to work very closely with you at the group level.

    The Business Model Makeover program is VALUED at well over $2000, but to keep it accessible, we’ve decided to offer it it at $1297

    However, as part of our ‘reverse launch’ for today and tomorrow, you can get in and secure your spot at $397

    Yip, that’s it.

    A high level training at a small investment.

    Click here to get the deets so far (over the coming weeks we’ll be adding more suprise BONUSES): http://www.femme-preneur.ca/model-makeover/

    Why are you making this business thing so hard?

    Why are you making this business thing so hard?

    No matter what stage you are in, in your business – it can be tempting to make things harder than they need to be.

    But why on god’s green earth would we do that to ourselves, when on a conscious level we say that we want things to be easy?

    The answer is actually simple.

    It’s fear.

    And so instead of facing the fear straight on, we try to get around it.

    Here is why you are making things harder than they need to be in your business:

    1) The mind loves to complicate things – especially when what you need to do is simple, but emotionally risky. Your mind will trick you into thinking it is hard, so that you don’t do anything that could change your life. To your subconscious mind, ‘the devil you know is safer than the devil you don’t know’. And so, to keep you from taking risks, it keeps you confused, lacking clarity and feeling like you are missing something – that way, nothing changes and you get to stay in the land of excuses and never make the bold moves that will change the way things are.

    2) We give ourselves too much time – here too, the root is fear and perfection paralysis. You give yourself way too much time to get shit done and that is why it takes so much time. You are afraid that you need like forever to get it perfect or just right – and so you give yourself so much time to do it, that by the time it is even close to done – you are burnt out, bored and bummed out about it….yet inspired by something new, but stuck trying to finish what you started.

    3) We ‘should’ on ourselves – anything that you choose to do because you think you ‘should’, but your heart isn’t really in it, is pretty much going to be a grind to get to the finish line. It will be hard to do on the emotional level. You’ll meet resistance the whole way and have to push yourself through. On the other hand, you much more easily rise to the challenge, when you meet obstacles on the way to creating something that your heart is fully in.

    So let me ask you this?

    • Is the current way that you are operating your business hard or does it feel in flow?
    • Is marketing a drag or does it light you up to share what you are up to?
    • Do you love giving your service or dread it?
    • If you don’t feel in flow, lit up and in love with your business, something needs to change.

    So the question is, what would need to change for you to feel that way?

    Honestly, this is a question you must consistently come back to in your business, to make sure that you keep creating from a place of love and not from fear (or lack).

    Every business needs a makeover from time to time.

    If you want guidance and support to do that, you’ll want to join our business model makeover program and we’ll help you think totally outside the box to recreate your business from what your heart feels, rather than from what your intellect is ‘yammering’ on about what you ‘should’ do.

    Let nothing stand in your way!

    You decided to become an entrepreneur for the freedom, and now it is time to stop enslaving yourself!

    7 Steps to Getting Unstuck (even if you’ve been using the same excuses for years and tired of hearing yourself say them)

    7 Steps to Getting Unstuck (even if you’ve been using the same excuses for years and tired of hearing yourself say them)

    If you are like me, you often feel that your energy is divided between so many of the things that are important to you.

    You don’t want to cut corners anywhere, yet feel like you are falling short everywhere.

    You want to create a business that compliments, rather than competes for your time (or your kids).

    You want to get serious about your dreams of being in business for yourself, but right now though, the lack of support in your life is making you wonder if you really have the energy and confidence to do this.

    I mean you already feel overextended as it is.

    And yet, the satisfaction of creating something just for you (maybe outside of your role as a mother/wife/partner?) would be sooo satisfying and validating!

    There is a reason the creator gave you those gifts, skills and talents (after all you don’t want to die with your dream in you right?)!

    I too struggled with feelings of doubt, fear and time poverty before I got serious about my biz.

    I oscillated between thinking that I didn’t have to give up my dreams to become a mother and that I would simply ‘do it all’ with my kids in tow…… to – worrying that being successful in business, meant that I had to neglect my kids to get there.

    I  had the thought that my business aspirations were causing me to lack presence with my kids and worse, that my they were the reason that I couldn’t fulfill my own and my business’s potential.

    With these opposing thoughts carrying equal weight in my brain, I was caught in a double bind…… ‘damned if I did and damned if I didn’t’.

    Like you, I found it extremely difficult to get very far with my business, because I was immobilized with fear and indecision.

    Somewhere, along the way I discovered that I was under the spell of a ‘program’, one that had been passed on from my mother and my grandmothers.

    I literally needed to see my thoughts for what they were, question them and rewire my brain to see what was really true.

    Once I discovered that these thoughts were simply ‘symptoms’ and not the ‘cause’, I was able to see clearly that what I really needed to do was heal the pattern. Not just for me, but so that I could pave the way for my own daughter (and future daughter in law!) to not have to struggle, the way I had.

    do somethingToday, I’ve made my kids part of my reason to succeed in business, rather than my excuse for playing small.

    I have made it my mission as a mother to ensure that my kids will never have to feel conflicted about whether or not living their dreams and serving their children’s needs simultaneously is possible – or question whether it is even the right thing to do ….(yes, I used to feel guilty….. like maybe I was doing something wrong to have aspirations outside of motherhood…as though it was just a necessary trade off to have to martyr myself to be a ‘good’ mom).

    And of course, that’s not all….I too had other issues getting in the way of giving myself permission to thrive in business.

    I found it extremely difficult to get very far with my business, because I was immobilized with the fear that people wouldn’t pay what I needed to charge to make my services translate into a viable income.

    Indecision and lack of clarity kept me paralyzed from taking action.

    But that’s not all….I too had other issues getting in the way of giving myself permission to thrive in business.

    I was scared to get out there, be seen and speak my truth – especially because my beliefs and my lifestyle was so ‘out there’.

    I had been a vegetarian for 13 years, I am anti vaccine, pro home birth and pro unassisted birth (I had two homebirths and birthed my daughter Jasmine by myself on purpose – not by accident on the way to the hospital!).

    I breastfed my both my babes for 4 ½ years each, and choose to embark on career paths in unregulated fields.

    Most of the time, I felt too alternative and misunderstood (even in alternative circles!). I felt like I had to hide my true feelings and beliefs to uphold some level of PC…enough to at least fly under the radar as a birth educator, Doula and nutritionist…quietly making a difference, but at the same time holding back.

    The businesses I wanted to start were unproven. I couldn’t do the market research, because the businesses I envision had never existed before.

    I had to trust my hunches, without external support or validation.

    In fact, when I graduated with my second certificate in holistic nutrition, my mother in law – a pharmacist – figured I had a lot of nerve to decide that path of holistic nutrition was an authentic profession – without the approval of a regulatory body –gasp! – she took the time to pull me aside to privately and smugly let me know that she didn’t validate me or my chosen career path.

    Besides moving forward in the face of disapproval and without support, I also had fears of stepping into the shoes of being seen as an expert, embarking on public speaking. It wasn’t only the stage fright that got to me, but also the fear of ’getting caught’ not knowing the answer or risking the possibility of appearing and feeling foolish.

    Finally, I dreaded the thought of being seen as ‘salesy’ or having to experience failure and/or rejection.

    Like you, I had too had at least as many internal as external obstacles to overcome.

    Beyond the emotional stuff though, it also felt like wading through mud with all the technical learning curves and getting steered off course with quick fixes where I couldn’t see the bigger picture.

    I didn’t have someone alongside me who could see where I was at, where I needed to be focusing my attention and efforts, along with the quickest and most painless way to get shit done!

    I promise you though, that as scary as it can be to put yourself out there and risk feeling judged, disapproved of or even mocked– the fear of these feelings is universal and every single person who has walked the path as a entrepreneur has had to walk through them to get to the other side.

    Even though it is scary, not only will you come out alive (disapproval doesn’t kill, even if it makes you feel like you are dying!), but you’ll soon discover that there is an equal and opposite experience on its way to you.

    You will in time feel accomplished, humbled by the praise of people who love you, support you and are so grateful for your service.

    But you have to do the work first.

    You have to give yourself approval now for your current accomplishments and self validate – by your courage to jump full into the experience and give it your all.

    No, you won’t offer the perfect product or service the first time (or ever really… because your standards will keep increasing!).

    Of course you can’t give your clients the level of service, that you will be able to give them 3-5 years from now.

    But you can rest assured that every risk you take helps you gain confidence, and each success builds on the next.

    Remember though, who you are right now is already enough.

    It is not a perfect product or process that transforms lives. It is your priceless presence that gives your service the power to make a difference in someone’s life!

    Make a decision now to commit to doing whatever is required to make your dream come true.

    Here is how to get to the other side of all the reasons why you think you can’t (insert your dream)…

    1. List your excuses and promise yourself that no matter what you will never say that out loud again to anyone, ever!
    2. Recognize that they are symptoms, not causes
    3. Determine the root cause
    4. Change your paradigm
    5. Decide what actions you need to take
    6. Summon the courage to ask for help and commit to the steps
    7. Hire a coach for direction, support and accountability

    Sound easier said, than done?

    If you are like me, you know that you’ll never get down to making the space and time to do this on your own.

    That’s because the stuff that keeps us stuck the most, is the hardest to look at, and stay with long enough to even look beneath the surface (the symptoms).

    It is the stuff that is super difficult to stay present to, and super easy to distract ourselves from.

    If you haven’t risen above it on your own by now, it is likely that you never will.

    I too was once standing in your shoes, knowing what I needed to do, but never doing it.

    Finally, I sucked it up and got the support, accountability and mentorship I needed ….and stayed with the process long enough to make this a life time practice.

    Want to chat about how you can get unstuck, finally close the chapter on all the reason’s you can’t and start creating a plan for how you can?

    If that sounds like exactly what you need next, click here to apply for a complimentary no obligation ‘Dream Design’ session and we’ll chat about how you can!

    What are the negative thoughts that always seem to come up, when you think of getting serious about your secret dream?

    The problem with giving away free health advice

    The problem with giving away free health advice

    One thing you will continue to notice as a nutritionist or other natural health practitioner is that people will want to know about a natural remedy for “what ails for them” without you really knowing anything about their unique situation.

    Sometimes the solution is something simple and easy. Sometimes it is not.

    Here is the dilemna.

    You will be tempted to give them free advice to be kind and generous, but you run the risk of that advice not being right (for them as an individual) and of losing your credibility with them (or reflecting badly on the credibility of natural medicine for all of us).

    Make a habit of getting the full picture before you make a recommendation……after all, that is what being a holistic practitioner is all about!

    When we recommend a natural remedy for a systemic problem, we are essentially philosophically looking through the lens of the medical mindset- the only difference is that the medicine that we recommend is natural!

    While I do agree that yes certain natural remedies can and do treat symptoms (and that they can take the much needed edge off the discomfort or be appropriate for where that person is at in terms of their ability to take responsibility for their health), rarely though can one natural remedy truly heal.

    As a holistic practitioner, you are trying to offer more than just a band aid.

    It is likely that you do this work because you wanted to help your clients heal at the level of root cause and you are not satisified with simply writing natural prescriptions for symptoms.

    Let that lady you met at party, the guy you sat beside on the bus or curious aquintances search the internet if they want to use natural remedies to relieve symptoms. It is easy and free, generally non toxic, does not take up your time or reflect badly on you if the top remedy ‘out there’ for their symptom does not work for them.

    You can still be helpful by recommending a website or a book you know that is great on the subject they are seeking help with. Let them know that you would be happy to chat with them about it when you are back in your office if they would like to book an appointment to speak with you.

    Take a risk on saying no to giving awayAs someone serious about transforming people’s health and lives, save your time and energy for people who want to go deep with you.

    Keep your focus on those that want to take the journey that you offer, so that you can really giving them your full time, energy and attention.

    Sure you face the dilemmna that people will think that you are stingy or trying to get something from them if you suggest that they make a formal appointment with you for personalized recommendations.

    I get it. We all want to be liked or at least avoid people’s dissapproval.

    But if you take the time to explain how you really work and why it is both best for them and for you, people really DO get it.

    It is all really logical when they take a moment to really think about it.

    As a holistic practitioner, how do I approach the question “What remedy should I take for (fill in the blank)?”

    I simply say something to the effect of….” this may not be the best remedy for you based on your unique situation but (such and such) is known as being a top remedy for (insert the symptom they asked about). In order to really offer you relevant advice though, I would need to look into your unique health situation and come up with a personalized plan that would have you heal (their issue) at the level of root cause, rather than just treat the symptoms.”

    This usually opens up a bunch of questions about your approach (which is great) because you get to pitch your work without feeling salesy.

    If it feels appropriate you can wrap up the conversation saying something to the effect of…..

    “If that sounds intriguing to you,  I offer a complimentary session that you can apply for  if you are interested in learning more about how I might be able to help”.

    If they are interested in exploring further, hand them the your business card (make sure it includes a link to where they can apply for your complimentary session eg: www.SherryRothwell.com/apply) and let them decide whether or not to take the next step to have a further converstion with you.

    Remember, if their eyes glaze over or they change the topic right away, they weren’t really seriously going to implement what you told them anyway, so be glad that you didn’t spend the time!

    Take a risk on saying “no” to giving away free health advice because in the end it is better for everyone.

    Better for you, better for them and better for the natural health field.

    If they want free health info, they can search the internet or if they want low cost info, they can take an e-course.

    In fact, if they spend the time and energy investing their money and time in less personalized solutions and do not eventually find the answers that they are looking for, they will be primed through that prior expended energy to better value YOUR time, energy and experience (if they do in fact become your client in the future!).

    And thats is a win-win for everyone.

    How about you? How do you handle these kinds of situations as a holistic practitioner? Tell me in the comments below!

     

    Why hiring a VA might be a better choice than a business coach

    Why hiring a VA might be a better choice than a business coach

    As strange as it might seem for me to be writing this (considering that I am a business coach), when push comes to shove and you need to focus down your energy and where you invest your moohlah, business coaching might not be your next best option.

    Coach or VAWhy? Because a business coaching will help you expand. If you are already feeling fully expanded to the point that you are in overwhelm with what you have already started, then I am guessing that you actually need to invest in the services of a virtual assistant to help you pull in the riegns and refine what you already have created -and take it to the next level of quality.

    Essentially my advice is to make the most of what you already have, so that you are ready to rock it out with a business coach.

    That is because the work that you do with a business coach is all about getting out there, marketing, creating new programs or re launching past ones….all stuff that adds to your plate and stretches you.

    A virtual assistant on the other hand, takes stuff off your plate.

    When we get stuck in our business, it is tempting to think that we just need more inspiration, ideas or to learn something new, like a…..

    • Another program to get you to 6 figures and beyond.
    • A fresh take on how to take your business to the next level etc.
    • Learn a new marketing approach that you had not thought of

    But if you do not have the support of a virtual assistant or others in place to help you with implementation, you will feel like you do not have the time to make good on all of the new strategy and insight that you can get from a coach.

    And sometimes that can be paralyzing.

    Ever invested a shit ton of money in a program and not done much with it?

    You are not alone, I have too.

    It is tempting to think that you wasted your money or that the program was shit (it is natural to want to place the blame outside of yourself…..but it is not fair).

    But let’s be honest here.

    If you went back to even the shittiest of programs that you invested in, in the past and actually took inspired action on everything you learned (or were reminded that you know) you would have something beautiful to show for it in the end ….and you would feel accomplished, feel good about yourself and about your work.

    But if you just let it sit there collecting dust, then you can be sure to add a sense of powerlessness, lack and self doubt to your overwhelm.

    My advice?

    Go back to the program and hire a VA to help you implement what you learned. Once you have done the work and feel proud of what you have created and feel ready to expand again, then hire another business coach.

    From a strategy perspective, taking the long view is the most sustainable. I believe that you need to suck the juice out of what you already have and make the most of it.

    To me that is starting from gratitude. Gratitude guarantees your abundance in this moment.

    Some business coaches would say, “no way! Invest in another program to keep you moving forward and cut your losses! Speed is of the essence.”

    I on the other hand think you need to make good on what you have already started to have the confidence in yourself to take on more.

    Sure you can get really brave, committ like you never have before and buy yourself a big ass coaching package….but if you do, you should still make hiring a VA your top priority (you are virtually gauranteed to get somewhere because they will actually accomplish some of the work for you!).

    Whatever you choose, remember to go deep before you speed ahead (get grounded first or you will start spinning with the speed and that means you’ll be going nowhere fast).

    So if you do not trust yourself to do the work right now, hire someone who will aka: a virtual assistant.

    Nature can help you decide.

    If you acknowledge natures wisdom as I do, there is a season for everything. Time for going inward and a time to go outward.

    As much as you need an in breath, you also need an outbreath. But not simultaneously.

    Consider a coach the out breath and a VA (virtual assistant), the in breath….

    Do you need to go deeper with what you already have in your business? Or do you need to expand into new territory?

    • want to go deep and re birth = virtual assistant
    • want to expand and challenge yourself = business coach

    Of course once your business is up an running as a living and breathing entity, then you need both to manage your energy and the flow of your business.

    For now, maybe this can help….

    I created this at-a-glance chart for you, to help you decide based on your current struggles if you need a coach or a virtual assistant to get unstuck.

    Coach vs VA

    Basically, if you are in start up, need a new business model or marketing stratgey, then you need a coach.

    If you have already worked with a business coach, taken a ton of trainings, have clarity, know your niche, have a strong brand and a signature program or products already created, then you need a virtual assistant.

    Your VA will help you set up your online and client care systems- helping you get all the nitty gritty accomplished so that you are ready to work with a coach again and start selling that shit!

    So what is it going to be? A coach or VA? Tell me in the comments (or let me know if you are still not sure) and we will look for more distinctions that can help.

     

    Are you a certification junky?

    Are you a certification junky?

    Do you ever find yourself saying (or thinking)..

    “When I get (insert name of certification), then I’ll ‘know enough’, ‘be credible’ or finally ‘feel ready’ to (insert not traditionally validated career path).”

    practiceAre you waiting to get certified (or more certifications) before you start helping people with your healing arts or coaching business, but find yourself holding back because you worry that you don’t know enough yet or you are concerned that your clients will question your credibility?

    As a certifiable certification junky (I have over 25 certifications in birth, nutrition, energy medicine and business!), I can honestly say I know a thing or two about what a certification does and doesn’t do for people.

    And one thing you can be sure of is that knowing enough, feeling credible or feeling ‘ready’ is something you can’t buy through a certification course – it is an inside job.

    I know this from personal experience, as much as I do from having taught and coached many other coaches, nutritionists and healers- they too wrestle with issues of credibility- no matter how many certifications and formal degrees they have.

    And it’s not because they don’t already have what they need to serve others- or to be successful in their businesses, but rather what keeps them cycling these thoughts, is the sticky nature of the mind itself.

    What people often don’t realize is that the mind doesn’t differentiate- (it has no consciousness). It is simply a recording and playback machine that regurgitates ‘the stuff’ that is already programmed in there.

    So if you have the ‘inner programs’ like: don’t ‘know enough’, ‘not credible’ or ‘never ready’ even with yet another certification under your belt, you’ll soon be facing the same dilemma.

    These very same programs will be triggered again by the fact that you will have to deal with marketing, speaking and sales conversations. If you are not careful, you’ll be facing the same thought that you just need one more certification to feel worthy of being seen, heard and paid for what you do.

    Wondering where these programs come from?

    They come from past painful experiences, from the cultural milieau and from the ‘stuff’ that the significant people in our lives ‘did’ or said when we had the so called audacity to….
    a) trust our belief  in spite of circumstances to the contrary
    b) when we didn’t hide feeling pleased by our accomplishments
    c) when we acted without ‘their permission’
    d) when we had the confidence to ‘start the ball rolling’ on an idea without having ‘all our ducks in a row’.
    e) when we dared to think the impossible possible
    f) when we raised the bar for ourselves

    It was when you stepped forward confidently in faith and with an intrinsic trust in yourself, in god/dess and in life- but somewhere along the way you let them get to you….you let someone or something make you doubt yourself.

    Likely they called you down, ‘put you in your place’ or projected worry on you (or were even suspiciousness or judgmental of you because they just didn’t understand or ‘get’ where you were coming from)…. and because you felt their feelings, it made you question, disapprove of or doubt yourself.

    Please realize that people who deeply disapprove of and harshly criticize themselves, hate to see others have the confidence to do what they won’t let themselves do.

    The good news though is that you did it to yourself.

    In other words you made the decision to believe them, and that’s why you also have the power to undo it- to reclaim your power and energy back from these experiences.

    If you had a bad experience in the past that made you feel like you weren’t smart enough, didn’t know enough or one that caused you to worry, question or doubt yourself – and you are STILL letting the voices of other people in your head keep you feeling unworthy, invisible or stuck…… you are not alone.

    But what you have to realize is that your issue is not a ‘certification deficiency’, it is an emotional block.

    You are seeking external approval, rather than generating it internally.

    It’s why despite the best insight into your own interior world, you can feel soooo inspired to make a difference in the world one day, and then completely deflated the next.

    It is why when push comes to shove, and you have to actually do the work, your confidence shrinks.

    That’s fear disguising itself as resistance.

    Resistance is a form of pride that fools you into questioning whether you really even want to do the work at all. It makes you look away from the real source of your emotional discomforts, so that you can’t disassemble the mind and it’s programs (the beliefs and feelings that your mind is cycling through).

    The mind will convince you that someone or something else is the cause of your incongruency or obstacles….ultimately pointing your effort in the wrong direction.

    Like towards yet another certification!

    The mind is not only sticky, but it is tricky too.

    Wondering how you can overcome this?

    It’s easy actually. So easy, in fact that most people will disregard it.

    The mind loves to keep us distracted with white lies, half truths and complex strategies that keep us looking away from the real source of the issue, rather than moving straight toward it.

    There are three ways to get to the other side of don’t ‘know enough’, ‘not credible’ or ‘never ready’ or any excuse, obstacle or resistance you consistently find yourself coming up against:
    1) Drop the tendency (requires the willpower to act in spite of fear, doubt and resistance)
    2) Release the emotion (requires vulnerability and the willingness to feel the discomfort)
    3) Drop the desire (requires the decision to let go of wanting safety, approval and control)

    For most people it requires learning a method or having 1 on 1 coaching from someone skilled in a modality that works with the emotional body.

    Once you release the self depreciating tendancy of needing externally generated validation, you’ll feel a deep sense of trust in yourself to just know what is needed next for your client… or you’ll just know what question to ask to uncover their next steps.

    The only certifications that are of any help are the ones you immediately put to use in service of another person’s well being.

    The only thing that will make you feel like you ‘know enough’ is the belief that what you need to know will be shown to you when you need it ( in the context of how you need to hear it).

    And that requires giving more credit to faith and to your intuition, than to the mind….. and it’s insatiable desire to prove what it already knows.

    Credibility comes through real life experience, helping real life people (and helping yourself).

    You have to learn as you go (that’s why what you do is called a practice!).

    Doing the work with people is the only way that you’ll find out what really serves (and what doesn’t) anyway.

    Are you going to be perfect at what you do on the first try (or ever)? Sorry, but no….we are all human and we all make mistakes- get over it.

    And is it possible that you could face critism, embarrassment or feel foolish for not knowing the answer -or not knowing how to help a person get unstuck?

    Yes,  for sure. And that’s why you have to care more about your vision or mission, than what people think of you.

    Who said you have to know everything about a subject to help someone anyway?

    In fact if you ever get to the place where you feel you know everything about a subject, I can pretty much guarantee that you are yet again at the precipice of discovering just how much of what you thought you know, is not the way you thought it was, anyway.

    No one gets to graduate. Quit preparing and just get started.

    The sooner you simply give up your perfection tendancies, the ‘not enough’ excuses and projections, the better your life will be….your job is simply to go out on a limb, learn and grow inside of the journey.

    So stop acting like your job is to sit on the sidelines, observe, take notes and stay invisible to avoid getting hurt. Just start doing the work.

    Certifications are wonderful.

    I recommend taking them as a lifelong learner, but not to validate yourself in someone else’s eyes. Don’t waste your energy with that.

    There are people who will love what you do, some will be indifferent and some might even hate what you do.

    Who cares? Just keep learning, growing and helping the people that are ready and ripe for the transformation that you offer.

    How to get out of overwhelm

    Recipe for OverwhelmRecently I started a 28 day cleanse and made invitations for 10 people to have complimentary calls with me to get unstuck in their business….all while having deadlines to create content and marketing copy to start a 3 week launch- for a new time sensitive program.

    I knew it would be a lot to do with the cleansing and adding more appointments to my schedule, but I felt I was up to the challenge.

    But here’s what I wasn’t expecting….

    3 days in bed with caffeine withdrawal headaches, my Grandpa died, my husband ended up working a lot of overtime (he’s on call so it’s never expected), my daughter got chicken pox and my son got the flu, all in less than 10 days.

    The only thing that I could have taken off my plate was stopping my cleanse, but I wasn’t willing to do that either- body before business ladies, because if you don’t have a body, you don’t have a business either.

    So I simply let go. The launch got put on hold. 

    I got present to my body, my family and my home. I stopped any and all ‘to-do’s’ that had to do with the future and simply got present to what was -and that meant a lot of sleeping, cooking and cleaning, tending to my kids and attending family functions centered around my Grandpa’s funeral.

    Sometimes life requires that we put our to-do list on the shelf for a while, convenient or not- you just need to do that sometimes- ‘no if’s and’s or but’s‘.

    You can choose to stop or life will stop you anyway, so why not surrender when you feel out of control? You are out of control anyway!

    Here is the great part…

    I want to share a little ‘something’ with you that works for me every single time I hit my own limit of ‘doing’ -or when life gets so ‘lifey’ that I am out of sync with my desires and goals, to the point that I can’t figure out how to get back on track with deadlines.

    I can’t tell you how many times this has paid off for me literally. Every time I do this, I am rewarded by new sales, new clients and new opportunities.

    That’s because people are attracted to working with people who have energy they like or want to have themselves. They are not attracted to working with people who are frenzied and exhausted (this often plays out subconsciously).

    While it might feel like a bit of a stretch of our faith- especially when we are stuck in the story and trying to figure it all out-  the truth is, when we feel overwhelmed- it is the perfect time to exercise our faith muscle- let go and let God/dess. Come back to it with fresh eyes and ‘in spirit’ (from a place of inspiration).

    We need to get back into the pull (attraction) mode -allowing what we desire to flow to us (which isn’t possible when we are in push mode). You can’t be repelling and attracting at the same time, so just stop it, drop it and roll with it already!

    Here’s how it is done…

    It begins with my mantra for overwhelm ‘stop, drop and flow’

    Step 1: STOP it
    Step 2: DROP it
    Step 3: ROLL with it

    Recipe for getting out of overwhelm…..

    Step 1: What do you need to do to shift the energy of how you are feeling and experiencing in the moment?

    Stop what you were doing and do that instead.

    Step 2: What do you need to drop or let go of?

    Drop it. Reconsider it. Release control and ask for help or guidance.

    Step 3: What do you actually feel like doing instead.

    Do what you REALLY feel like doing and  then come back to your goals and deadlines when INSPIRATION arises (and it will if you let go in faith).

    On the other hand, when we are out of sync (or pushing to get things done), everything takes longer and we end up creating the exact scenario that we are trying to avoid- running out of time to accomplish it all.

    Not only is ‘pushing’ a waste of time, but we feel frustrated and worse, the outcome will be a match to the energy we had in the doing/creation mode- and then we don’t get the results that we hoped for- the struggle feels worthless- like it was for nothing- and it was.

    How we do it, is how it will manifest- so we must do what ever it takes to keep the energy in alignment with the outcome we want.

    Even if that means stopping altogether and waiting for the breakthrough…in the meantime, we can shift the energy by attending to clutter, having a bath, nourishing our body, going for a walk or whatever feels like a balm for your weary soul.

    Only go back to that stuff that needs to get done once your energy is shifted, the answer has come or you’ve acquired the help you needed in the first place.

    So the next time you feel overwhelmed, instead of pushing forward unproductively, stop, drop and roll with it!